back from house sitting for the parents.
I've been sick the whole weekend, it's not horrible just slowing me down a little.
Mr. Black and Bitter called me last night and we talked for an hour. it's funny how out of something so shitty I could end up with some as great as the friends I have. I wonder if it's that common of an occurance... to date someone because their friends are great.
So I've actually been spending some quality time with D-land lately. reading other diaries than the ones I normally do and I actually found some that are pretty good for a change. Whatever do you know......
it would seem my roomate did indeed get some smoochies nothing else this weekend. which basically means I am so completely out of luck because it has been established that my roomate at I balance the universe. if he is happy and has a girl then I must be alone or the world will spin completely out of control. this is just how tings must be for we are the ying and yang. well this is just a theory.
attractive boys who would like to take me to dinner are welcome to challenge this theory just don't blame me when the world spins out of control.
as for that other thing going on with me..... still not sure what to do about it. I know I'm going to at least look into it but I'm not holding my breath or really thinking anything will happen. Sure there is a tiny smidgen of hope but someone once told me the defination of insanity is repeating the same action hoping for different results.
For someone with a hard crusty shell part of me is a slight romantic deep down. I'm keeping my options open. All of them. You never know what might be outside your door and even if there is nothing there I'll be cool with that too. though I think nothing being there is a slim posibilty because if I've learned nothing else when it rains it pours.
and on a completely other note my step brother called the house before I left to talk to the parents because his girlfriend had the baby last night (don't get me started on my stupid people shouldn't breed thing) it's funny to see exactly how different of paths people can take. Not that I ever had anything in common with my step brothers besides our parents being married to each other. But here he is 22 with 2 kids and what not and here I am pushing 25 and the only long term relationship Ive had was the most dysfunctional, unhealthy thing I;ve seen in a long time. I've never been engaged or even remotely close to it. and it's up for grabs if I've ever really been in love. I'm not envious, I just wonder sometimes. not that I want to be saddled with 2 kids. But if I was a different person would I be amrried now and live in a house and have that picket fence life? it's not me. but could it have been me if something had been different. I think too much about things I'll never have answers to I suppose.
a good portion of my friends are in relationships that probably will lead to marriage. Probbaly in the next couple of years. I've never thought seriously about marriage not enough to know if being doomed to be a bridesmaid is such a bad thing. they just better not be ugly dresses. that's all I have to say on that..... (You hear me girls I know in realtionships.... no ugly dresses.)