I am surprised that no one has sued Hollywood for emotional damages. All those writers, directors, actors, singers, songwriters perpetuate the myth that caring, having feelings, loving someone is enough. Well it is not. And if you're dumb enough to think that it is I suppose you deserve to get trampled on.
We're raised on this fantasy that love conquers all, there is a someone out there for everyone, all your hard work pays off in the end.
That, my friends, is a load of bullshit. Nothing anyone does in the pursuit of love is worth it because it all just turns to shit in the end anyhow, right? Right. You can be as a kind and as caring as you want. You can go out of your way, above and beyond what's required of you but in the end it doesn't matter. They never care about you and here you are expelling all this energy and all they do is let you down. Because honestly why should they have to do anything, you're doing it all. Beside how could you ever really be that important anyway?
So why do we bother? Do we hope we are wrong? Do we hope we'll be happy with someone at least for awhile even if there is no fairy tale ending? Well I want to be done with it. I want to stop dreaming, I want to stop caring for people who just let me down in the end and make me feel like fool.
How hard could it be? To just give up. To say "I'm sorry I'm done with this." And then to never have to think about it, worry about it, cry over it again.
Would it be lonely? Would it make my insides hard? Would I be cold?
I don't know the answers to anything else so why would I know the answers to those questions.
I'm still looking for that cupidly intervention where it all just works out. But I know it's not coming.