wow. so. an entirely new adventure. Why does the word adventure looks so wrong in print? Possibly beer has hampered my spelling abilities. I've been in this new places for a mere two weeks and right now with the help of adult libations I feel horribly homesick. I want nothing more than to be in my old neighborhood, in my old bar where everyone who walks in the door is someone I've seen before. I dare not say these things to my friends because it's crazy.
I am for the most part loving where I am. I really like having nowhere to go, not knowing anyone. I was so sick and tired of the social obligations my life presented. Same story, new cast. but right now I just feel vulnerable and lonely and even if those who rejected me and hurt me the most walked in the door I would probably welcome them with open arms if only for the familar face. It's so hard going somewhere you've never been before where you only know one person and for the most part have very little in common with them.
People told me it was brave when I decided I would do this and I laughed them off. I don't feel brave. right now I feel scared and lonely. but I'm here none the less and tomorrow I'll be happy to go to work if only to see smiling faces.
I don't do so well alone. I always thought I would but I was wrong. I've always had friends to fall back on and now I'm pretty much on my own.
sick to think, but I would love some brief love affair just to hold me out until I get more established. something to focus on until I get my feet under me.