I am incredibly annoyed with myself.
beyond annoyed really.
who needs enemies when you have yourself.
Yes I think I've done it again.
gotten myself all wired about something only to start second guessing.
if it isn't how I think it is it isn't the end of the world, but I'll be..... I don't know... let down I guess.
I'm smarter than this and yet I let myself fall into the trap every damn time. ugh ugh ugh.
so now what?
it's always the question.... what to do now?
holy hell, I don't know.
I can either walk away from the sitaution and always be bothered that I didn't find out what was going on.
Or I could stay and go with the slim possiblity that things will be cool.... though more than likely it's looking kinda uncool. pessimisim, it's a gift. Though half of my friends would slap me silly if they heard me right now.
I have a complete lack of ability to look at things subjectivly lately.
I could go to the source but I guess I'm afraid of that.
oh the vaugness of it all.
if I wasn't home alone and pretty much brain dead it wouldn't be bothering me in the least but I have nothing else to think about so here we go.
I'm starting to think I shouldn't even bother turning on my computer half of the time, I wouldn't get myself so wound up if I didn't. It just opens up an avenue for people to pester me and not want to go away.
I guess they don't get the "If I wanted to talk to you I would seek you out." vibe I give off. They don't seem to understand I have no desire to leave the house. not even if they make me feel guilty.... matter of fact that makes me want to leave the house even less. Yes, so I think it's back to Zim, before I'm really nasty and mean to to someone.
besides, hyponotic pimples are hilarious.